Frequently Asked Questions
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By Thomas Cox, DP Vice President |
How can those in conflict and in mourning be asked to reach out beyond their own communities? |
Aren't the differences of Israelis and Palestinians too great to discuss? |
| The moment of least hope is the moment of greatest need for dialogue. To believe that no one outside our own communities cares, is to believe a myth. In dialogue, in every meeting, we have many demonstrations of real care and concern for others, while at the same time we have recongnition that we have differences even with those closest to us. We keep hope alive for those living in despair in the Middle east.
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The greatest difference is not between Palestinians and Israelis, or between Muslims, Christians and Jews – the greatest difference is between those who perpetuate conflict and injustices, and those willing to sit down as equals in dialogue, even with someone considered an enemy. |
| Who is included in the dialogue meetings? |
What is the goal of these meetings? |
| Participants come from all different backgrounds, religions, countries and communities. Many have a direct connection to Palestine and/or Israel. We strive for a balanced mix of backgrounds. Facilitators have had training to help participants hear each other, to keep sharing on an equal basis, and to help clarify any misunderstandings.
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We have an opportunity here in New York that is missing in the Middle east. Here we have no barriers to dialogue, except the barriers we hold within ourselves. As the number of those in dialogue increases, and these dialoguers go back to their communities, dispelling the myths about “the other” and passing along information learned from each other, we acquire power- our voices make more and more of a difference. To gain real power, individuals must reach out beyond their own communities, beyond those with whom they already agree. |
| What is required to be in dialogue? |
What is the format of a dialogue meeting? |
| A commitment to meet with your group once each month and to be at the meeting on time. Meetings last two to two-and-a-half hours. We ask everyone to work to improve their listening skills, to speak from personal experience, and to consider themselves on an equal basis with all others present. We practice “active,” generous,” “reflective” listening, attempting to really hear and understand the other, whether we agree or disagree with what is being said. |
We sit together in a circle, with 5 to 25 other participants and 1 or 2 facilitators. We introduce ourselves, giving a little more time to the person there for the first time. We review the guidelines. Then we begin our discussion with a topic generated by the participants in the last meeting, or with a reporting of current events. We strive to listen carefully and to speak honestly, from the hear, while discussing the most difficult topics - “right of return,” “Zionism,” “security,” amount others. We try not to demonize others – avoid speaking disrespectfully while speaking accurately. We keep our discussions centered on issues relating to Palestine and Israel. |
| How can my one voice make any difference? |
What are the guidelines for a dialogue meeting? |
| Your voice may be the one to bring understanding to one person on the other side. |
1) Time limit – usually 3 minutes at a time; try not to dominate the conversation. 2) Do not interrupt while others are speaking 3) If you don't hear or understand something, raise your hand and ask for clarification.
4) Outside of the meeting, feel free to talk about the subjects spoken of, but do not give names or say anything that might identify a participant – keep all names confidential.
5) Speak from the “I” - personal experience – I saw, I heard, I feel; avoid claiming that your views represent the views of everyone in your community. 6) Turn off cell phones during the meetings. |
| What is the position of The Dialogue Project on current Middle East issues? |
Who runs The Dialogue Project? |
| Because any view, belief or opinion is welcome in dialogue, the organization does not take a political position. People with very differenet views come into dialogue. We advocate dialogue as a non-violent alternative to conflict. |
We have a Board of Directors consisting of people willing to do extra work to promote The Dialogue Project. We strive to include board members from different backgrounds, with different views, as in our dialogue circles |
| Was the organization formed as a response to 9/11? |
What is the cost of participation in The Dialogue Project? |
| No, it was formed before 9/11, in response to heightened hostilities in Israel and Palestine. |
There is no cost. Our organization runs on donations from many sources including individual dialogue participants. Free child
care is available on request. |
| Where are the meetings held? |
Will I gain personally from participation in dialogue? |
| Currently we have meetings in Brooklyn (Bay Ridge, Brooklyn Heights, Carroll Gardens, Cobble Hill and Park Slope), Manhattan (Upper East Side, Upper West Side, Midtown), and Riverdale/Westchester. |
If you make full use of this opportunity, you may learn to communicate more clearly, and feel more comfortable when relating to those different from yourself. Your ability to see from other perspective will be enhanced. You can become more effective in working with others. Your capacity for friendship with those whom you disagree will increase. |
| May I drop in and observe a meeting? |
Where is additional information on The Dialogue Project available? |
| No, please call first to discuss what will be best for you and the other dialogue participants. |
Call Linda Sarsour, Outreach, (718) 745-3532; Marcia Kannry, Founder, (718) 768-2175; Thomas Cox, Vice President, (718) 965-2812. |
